Many of you probably know that EverSoLightly and I have been together since 2008. On the outside, on every social media network, you’ll find very few details about our life together. Mostly, you’ll find lots of wonderful photos taken over the past 6, yes 6 years. EverSoLightly has been by my side through more than I could even begin to explain. He’s been there for me when people I love and care about have fallen ill, had surgeries, or, in a few rare cases, passed away. He stood by my side when I was un-employed and dead broke. He’s been my rock and the voice of reason when I need one.
Don’t let the above fool you though, because I’ve been by his side through a lot too. As a whole, we are always there for one another, regardless what’s going on. He was my shoulder to cry on, many holidays in a row when the world left me beaten and bruised. I was by his side when we found out a member of his family was in the hospital, and he just needed someone to sit in silence with him while he processed the news.
When we started our relationship, he was a fresh faced young 19 year old kid. I was a goofy newly 21 year old. Together we’ve grown up, and experienced many life “firsts.” We both moved into our “first” apartment together. We had no idea what we were doing, and boy did it show. We lived in an un-furnished apartment for 6 months. Slept on a twin sized air mattress we had borrowed from our friend Lauren’s parents. Really, I slept on the air mattress and he slept on the floor. We had a dresser, and my little tv/dvd player combo. That was it. Over the first 6 months we collected some odds and ends from Lauren’s parents, and Lauren herself really… we found ourself with a couch, and some dishes… and eventually a full sized blow-up mattress. Times were rough, money was nonexistent and we didn’t have working cars. that first year was amazing. No, truly, it was!
I can’t even begin to tell you the adventures we went on… mostly because they were only adventures to us…walking through our small city might not sound like an adventure to you… but it was to us. We had so many negative comments and vibes sent our direction when we first started our relationship, that we had to find the beauty in everything we did, or we wouldn’t have made it.
As time wore on, and we adjusted to living on our own, we grew closer. He was easily my best friend. We not only lived together, but we also worked together. After work on fridays we’d go down to the common area in our apartment building and have nerf wars. When you’re young, broke, and in love, you’ll find any possible way to have an adventure together. Nerf guns provided plenty of fun date nights!
What social media, photos and even looking at him and I together doesn’t tell you, the tough times. Believe me, we have had our fair share. We’ve fought over what to eat for dinner, whether or not he was wearing my socks… you name it, we’ve “discussed” it. i’ve cried over stupid things, and irrationally gotten upset. He’s given me the silent treatment over things we now laugh at. My point? We’re human. We have flaws, we aren’t any different than anyone else. Every healthy relationship has ups and downs. To me, its a sure sign our relationship is growing with us.
At the end of the day, we make a great team, and love one another unconditionally. People on the outside don’t see that… heck,even some close to us don’t really see how well we work together. We have, thus far, defied all odds, and shown some debbie downers that we’re in this for the long haul.
The one thing people ask all the time, is if/when we’re getting married. They have discussions and arguments for every answer I could give them…. this is such a heavy question. I have had many battles with this question, because as a whole young couples are always pressured to get married and if you wait too long you’re doing it wrong. Really, I don’t battle this at all anymore, but I have in the past. We have certain family members and friends that always ask other couples, who have been together a quarter of the time we have, when they’re getting married, and even pressure the couples to get engaged soon.
Since when has it been socially acceptable to tell people that they need to get married? Shouldn’t this be something that happens naturally and organically? EverSoLightly and I will stand before everyone we know, and stress out over plans and details and worry about the people who don’t approve of our marriage, when we’re ready to deal with all of that. Right now, we’re committed to one another, and the two of us and God are the only ones that need to know.
We don’t owe explanations, or definition’s to anyone but ourselves, and through the past 6 years I’ve learned that this is such an important factor in a relationship. You know, aside from loving, caring, and being there for one another through thick and thin.
Just looking back at the past few years, I am so incredibly lucky to have spent them with EverSoLightly. He’s everything I could have imagined when I was a little girl. He’s gentle, loving yet firm and reliable. He has a good sense of adventure and does an amazing job cooking delicious foods. He’s artistic, and modest, and one of the best things Icould mention, he loves my family and they love him.
Not only has he accepted me, and all my crazy quirks into his life, but he’s accepted my friends and family and welcomed them as his own. Nothing is more wonderful than seeing him spend time with my nephews. It warms my heart through and through to see the four of them bond together.
It’s been no secret if you knoweither of us that we’ve struggled to be accepted by his family, and we’ve worked hard to show them that we really are in this for the long haul. I’m sure I’m not who they pictured their only son to spend the rest of his life with, but I’m also certain that they have accepted and witnessed the love he and I have for one another.
I don’t want to put anegative emphasis on his family, because they have been a steady and strong influence in his life alone as well as ours together. For that we could never thank them enough. So take the paragraph above with a grain of salt and understand that the past is the past and we’re living in the moment.
I think these past 2 years or so, we’ve been in a rough patch so to speak. More specificallywe’vebeen busy trying to figure out this whole adult thing. These past couple months we’ve started to get back on track and are spending more time just to truly listen to one another and hear what we have to say. We’re trying to keep that spark of adventure in our lives, the one that we had years and years ago when we were just starting off. I can assure you this autumn and winter will be filled with many adventures, and hey, maybe even a few more blog posts!
At the end of each and every day, I thank God for all that he has given me, and for bring EverSoLightly into my life. He came in at the perfect moment, and he’ll always be my Prince Charming. I cannot thank God enough for the gift of love that we have for one another.